TV Life Lessons From Buffy The Vampire Slayer That Are Still Valuable.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer stars Sarah Michelle Gellar, Alyson Hannigan, Nicholas Brendon, James Marsters, David Boreanaz, Amber Benson, Bianca Lawson, Danny Strong, Juliet Landau, Anthony Head, Seth Green, Charisma Carpenter & show creator Joss Whedon have taught us important life lessons through their characters & storylines that we still apply today.

Chelsie Overocker

AfterBuzz TV Host & Writer
Posted On: May 24th, 2020 11:45pm pst

Maria Menounos
Keven Undergaro
AfterBuzz TV Founders

Founded by Emmy winning journalist Maria Menounos and Producer Keven Undergaro, AfterBuzz TV is the artist-friendly entertainment news platform that celebrates, discusses, interviews, promotes and reports on the widest range of stars, creators and content through video, audio and article publications.

ABTV TV Life Lessons: Buffy The Vampire Slayer 

So many of our favorite TV shows and characters inspired us growing up and even to this very day.  They have deeply impacted our lives and even taught us a thing or two or twenty. Welcome to AfterBuzz TV’s ‘TV Life Lessons’ where we explore the many life lessons our beloved series and cast have shared with us. 

In this edition we report on the top life lessons we learned from one of our favorite TV Series, Buffy The Vampire Slayer.

Joss Whedon created a series that not only had a strong female lead but gave women the encouragement that we too can fit the role of Clark Kent. 

Credit: The WB

“I’m the thing that monsters have nightmares about.”- Buffy Summers

Besides just slaying vampires, demons, or any force of evil that steps foot in Sunnydale, Buffy The Vampire Slayer also taught us many lessons that we still use and had some of the best monologues in TV history. 

Our first lesson is from our fearless leader Buffy Summers [Sarah Michelle Gellar] Season 3 Episode 18 “Earshot.”  After Buffy defeats a telepathic demon, she starts developing the ability to read minds. At first it’s fun where she’s able to hear what guys think of her and hearing her teacher’s thoughts making her appear to be the smartest student in class (very astute). But like any other supernatural gift there are consequences and Buffy starts becoming overwhelmed hearing everyone’s voices in her head.  

Credit: ENews

One particular voice that stands out to Buffy is when she  overhears someone planning on killing everyone in the school. Overwhelmed with her new ability, Buffy is having a hard time tracking down the killer. Racing against the clock Buffy figures out that the voice belongs to Jonathan Levinston [Danny Strong] and makes him realize no matter how successful, beautiful, or popular we are, everyone has issues they are dealing with. 

“My life happens to, on occasion, suck beyond the telling of it. Sometimes more than I can handle. And it’s not just mine. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they’re too busy with their own.”

Credit: Screenrant

“The beautiful ones. The popular ones. The guys that pick on you. Everyone. If you could hear what they were feeling..the loneliness. The confusion. It looks quiet down there. It’s not. It’s deafening.” 

This is an important message we can use everyday; especially right now. During these uncertain times our world has changed drastically within the past few months. This is the first time where there isn’t traffic on the highways and the streets are nearly empty. Everything is quiet. But even though it may appear peaceful outside, we all are dealing with our own issues. 

It doesn’t matter if we’re celebrities with successful careers or someone who is struggling to get by, we are all going through this together and getting affected in some capacity. 

While we’re experiencing dark times in our life, sometimes all we need is love to get us by. The next important lesson we learned is from David Boreanaz [Angel] Season 2 Episode 18 “Passion.” He states without passion we truly wouldn’t be living and sometimes feelings can create the finest moments in our lives, even if they are painful. 

Credit: Weebly

“The source of our finest moments; the joy of love, the clarity of hatred, and the ecstasy of grief. It hurts sometimes more than we can bear. If we could live without passion, maybe we’d truly know some kind of peace. But we would be hollow. Empty rooms, shuttered and dank. Without passion, we’d truly be dead.” 

Season 2 was a hard time for us if we were shipping Angel and Buffy. After Angel loses his soul and is referred to as “Angelus” he causes Buffy and her friends pain on numerous occasions. Angel was wrong in a lot of situations but he was right about one thing…passion is the raw emotion that makes us feel alive. 

Credit: The WB

So if you’re experiencing something that’s electrifying and never want that moment to end, or going through something that’s terrifying, we may not have all the answers. Be grateful that you are able to feel the emotions, because life without any emotion would be pretty boring. 

While we’re experiencing these emotions, they can also add up to the biggest moments in our lives. This lesson is one of our favorites that the show taught us, in Season 2, Episode 21, “Becoming Pt. 1.” 

Kendra [Bianca Lawson] and Buffy team up to try to redeem Angel’s soul but unfortunately things don’t go as planned. Buffy assumes fighting Angel would stop him from ending the world but learns that it was never about her fighting Angel. He was a distraction so Dru [Juliet Landau] could kill Kendra. 


By the time Buffy figures this out, she’s rushing to Sunnydale high school to find Giles missing and Kendra dead. As Buffy is running to the library, trying to get to Kendra in time, Whistler [Max Perlich] delivers a monologue that moves us. 

Credit: The WB

“Even if you see them coming you’re not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So, what are we, helpless? Puppets? Nah. The big moments are gonna come, you can’t help that. It’s what you do afterwards that counts. That’s when you find out who you are.” 

There are many times in our lives that we question why we got put in a particular situation. Maybe it’s overcoming an illness or watching a loved one go through a difficult time and trying to be there for them as much as possible. Maybe it’s realizing a relationship that you thought would last forever is suddenly coming to an end. There are a lot of situations that we’ve experienced that have been out of our control. But what we can control is how we handle the aftermath. It’s okay if you are still learning this lesson, even our favorite slayer had to learn this a few times throughout the series. 

When you’re learning how to handle unexpected moments that come into our lives, it’s okay to look up to someone for guidance (who doesn’t). Season 4, Episode 1 “The Freshman,” Buffy is having a hard time adjusting to the college lifestyle and feels that everyone is able to adapt to new changes except her. On top of that there is a new vampire on campus that steals all of Buffy’s stuff from her dorm room (we hate bullies). Normally Buffy would be ready to fight back, having a sarcastic line in mind,but this time she feels down about herself. 

Credit: Fanpop

Xander [Nicolas Brendon] shows up giving Buffy that extra boost she needs to bring the slayer back to life (we all admire their friendship). 

“I’ve gone through some fairly dark times in my life. Faced some scary things…let me tell you something. When it’s dark and I’m all alone and I’m scared or freaked or whatever. I always think, what would Buffy do? You’re my hero.”  

Credit: The WB

When we face challenging times in our lives sometimes we just need one person who we admire to help us see the light at the end of the tunnel. This important moment taught us that it’s okay to express to someone that they made a difference in your life, chances are you probably made an impact in their life as well. 

If you are lucky to find one person who has made an impact in your life and they happen to be the person you love..tell them, don’t wait. One thing Buffy has taught us is don’t wait for that “perfect” moment to let someone know you care for them…because you might not ever get that moment. 

This next lesson comes from Season 6 Episode 18 “Entropy.” One of our favorite couples Willow [Alyson Hannigan] and Tara [Amber Benson] whose love story ended in tragedy when Tara died from a gunshot wound. Before her death she confesses to Willow that they belong together and shouldn’t waste another second apart from each other.  

Credit: Nerdist

“There’s just so much to work through. Trust has to be built again on both sides. You have to learn if we’re even the same people we were. If you can fit in each other’s lives. It’s a long and important process. And can we just skip it? Can you just be kissing me now?” 

We love this quote so much we might even use it during our wedding vows….but, seriously, don’t wait. If you want something, ask for it. If you love someone, tell them. Life is fragile. 

That’s exactly what Spike [James Marsters] does when he tells Buffy how much she really means to him in Season 7 Episode 20 “Touched.”   

Credit: The WB

“When I say I love, it’s not because I want you, or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try…I’ve seen your kindness, and your strength, I’ve seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You’re hell of a woman. You’re the one Buffy.”  

Buffy and Spike’s relationship has always been up and down. However, the dialogue between the two characters has always been well written leaving us viewers compelled. 

Credit: Entertainment Weekly

Buffy is upset that the potential new slayers have decided to not have her be their leader anymore; she turns to Spike for comfort. 

This life lesson is something we will take to heart. Even if you aren’t meant to be with someone you can still let them know how important they are to you too. Every person that crosses our path is there for some reason. 

Our last lesson Buffy taught us was in the series finale, Season 7 Episode 22 “Chosen.” When she is giving the last iconic speech in the series she’s telling the potential slayers that every girl will have the power to stand up for themselves. You don’t need one slayer to protect you from darkness, you can protect yourselves. 

Credit: The WB

“I say my power..should be our power..make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?” 

We can utilize this saying in our daily lives whenever we face challenging moments in our lives. We liked that Buffy started off as one of the first TV characters that emphasized women empowerment, but we love how the series ended with ALL women being powerful. 

Credit: Looper

Every woman has an inner Buffy Summers within themselves and remember: if you don’t believe in yourself, who else will? We are always ready to be strong!

Those were our top life lesson moments that Buffy The Vampire Slayer has taught us and if you ever need a review you can binge the show on Hulu

Credit: Tyla

Make sure you are following all of the stars from Buffy the Vampire Slayer on social media to keep updated with their newest projects. 

If you love Buffy The Vampire Slayer, and love our AfterBuzzTV TV Life Lessons series, please share this article with a friend. And tune in daily to AfterbuzzTV for aftershows, articles and all the latest TV and pop culture news and information.

About The Author:

Chelsie Overocker is a host for AfterBuzz TV. She grew up in Denver, Colorado and graduated with a Bachelor’s degree in communications and marketing.

Founded by Emmy winning journalist Maria Menounos and Producer Keven Undergaro, artist-friendly AfterBuzz TV is the world’s largest digital broadcast network and pop culture news platform, producing post-game ‘after-shows’ for nearly all favorite TV shows, interviewing cast and showrunners and providing the widest video, audio and article coverage of shows, content and influencers than any entertainment news platforms in existence

“We don’t just celebrate and cover the top shows, content and stars, we celebrate and cover ALL the shows, content and stars.”

Maria Menounos

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